134. Go Places in a Limo

Comfortable spacious seating, fully stocked bar, tinted windows that block out the prying eyes of the riff raff.  There really is no better way to get around.  This is something that presidents, super villains and millionaire playboys have known for a long time.

The beautiful thing about rolling in a limousine, however, is that it also essentially gives you the right to blare music and demand attention.  The basic assumption of those outside the car is that those inside are having the time of their lives.  You owe it to those outsiders to live up to their expectations.  This is why grade 12 girls insist on standing out  the sun roof on grad night.  Cuz it’s awesome!

This is great news.  If some irate mobster sends a limo around to pick you up and take you on “one last ride”, you can rest easy knowing that at least you’re going out in style:

Jimmy Hoffa: So, where are we going?

Mobster: Giants Stadium.

Jimmy Hoffa: Awesome!  Mind if I pour myself a drink?

 

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5 Responses to “134. Go Places in a Limo”

  1. Important caveat: don’t ever get one of those Hummer limo-things, because then you look like an ostentatious try-hard chump with a deep-seated need to compensate for inadequacies in your pants (or hat).

    But thanks to those dicks, rolling around in a black stretch limo basically looks restrained and classy – even if you may be inside gargling mescaline-and-saffron-infused vodka. Nice!

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  4. Kala den itan plaka,ennoeitai!Epatha patatrak otan ehmtaa oti pantreuesai!Den peirazei esu na’sai kala,mazi me ti gunaika sou kai na zisete polu polu eutuxismenoi ki egw tha xairomai mono pou tha diavazw ta posts sou…

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