Archive for the skills Category

135. Be Awesome at Shuffling Cards

Posted in skills, sweet videos on November 24, 2010 by Allen

Or any kind of card manipulation for that matter.  The sweetest part of any poker hand is when the dealer goes from a Tornado Box Opener  to a Buckeye, into a Ribbon Spread followed by a Riffle Shuffle and a Card Spring Flourish before finally dealing out the cards.  This is how you achieve full croupier status.

The only drawback to becoming awesome at card manipulation is that it requires practice.  Unfortunately, at the beginning this practice usually results in cards flying everywhere.  That sucks.  To fix this problem, you can do one of three things:

1.  Get good quickly.

2.  Have 10 or 15 different decks of cards on the table.  If one blows up all over the place, let it go.  Just grab the next deck and keep on practicing.

3.  Have a couple of kids running around picking up all the cards when they fall to the ground.  To them, you’re just playing 52 Pickup, and all kids love 52 Pickup.

Remember, it’s not wether you win or loose, it’s how you make the cards dance!

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133. Know the Lyrics to Songs

Posted in skills on October 19, 2010 by Allen

And sing with your friends.

There is no greater feeling of community than suddenly breaking into song with a bunch of people and perfectly belting out the lyrics.  It can happen at anytime, the right song comes onto the radio and BAM, instant karaoke bar!

Basically what the group of you are saying is, “I know this song, you know this song, we all know this song and we’re awesome because of it.  Now let’s share it with the world!”

132. Break a Record

Posted in skills on October 11, 2010 by Allen

Any record.  We are a culture obsessed with peak human achievement.  Remember how, as a kid, you constantly read The Guinness Book of World Records?  You were preparing yourself for now.

It can be anything from tying knots in cherry stems with your tongue to getting the high score in Donkey Kong.  The important thing is that you now own that particular activity.  The next time one of your friends tries to see how many marshmallows they can stuff in their mouth, they’ll know that they’re competing against you!

You Are Legend!

129. Make a Killer Sandwich

Posted in skills on September 14, 2010 by Allen

Guy 1: “I’m going to make myself a sandwich, you want one?”

Guy 2: “O.K., sure.”

Cut, slice, open, cut, spread, sprinkle, place, cut.

Guy 1: “Here ya go.”

BITE!

Guy 2: “Mmmmm…Woah!  Dude, what’s in this?”

Guy 1: “Sliced tomatoes, havarti cheese, cucumbers, sprouts, spinach, sundried tomato turkey breast, bacon, avocado, granulated garlic dijon mustard, lightly toasted multigrain bread.  Just a few things I had in the fridge”

Guy 2: “This is amazing!”

Guy 1: “It’s what I do.”

What’s better than making your friend an awesome drink?  Making them a killer sandwich.

126. Save a Falling Drink

Posted in skills on August 26, 2010 by Allen

Let’s break this down moment by moment.

You’re at a party chatting with a group of people.  Suddenly, while trying to emphasize a point in the story they’re telling, your drunk friend makes an exaggerated hand gesture and knocks the drink out of someone else’s hand!

Because you are constantly in a cat-like state of readiness, you see this happen even before it happens.  You lunge.  Everything is in slow motion.  You are acting on pure instinct.  You can see the matrix.

Just before the drink hits the floor, you catch it!  Didn’t even spill a drop.

You return the drink to Ol’ Butterfingers’ hand and casually whisper, “The first one’s free.”

122. Learn Kung-Fu

Posted in skills on August 4, 2010 by Allen

Or any martial art for that matter.  Hell, even Tai Chi, when done right,  looks pretty damn cool. Especially with a snowfall of pink cherry blossoms in the background.

As always, you want to be kind of casual about this.  A clean backfist to kill an annoying mosquito or the occasional roundhouse to close the fridge is ideal.  Leaving your hook swords out when company comes over is a little tacky.

Now, I’m not saying that demonstrating the Plum Flower Fist is the best way to win an argument, but it sure would be nice to know that tool’s in your belt should you need to be more “convincing”.

121. Have a “MacGyver Moment”

Posted in skills on July 23, 2010 by Allen

Sometimes you just don’t have the right tools for the job.  Now you have to improvise.

The beauty of the “MacGyver Moment” is threefold:  1. The satisfaction of finding some materials that might work 2. The thrill of assembling it all together into some fandangled contraption that seems to work, and finally 3. The awe and admiration on your friends’ faces when everyone realizes that the aforementioned gizmo totally works!

All you need is a little resourcefulness, a garage full of nicknacks, and the audacity to try something crazy.  Remember, cool readers, Benjamin Franklin discovered electricity because of a “MacGyver Moment” (or so saturday morning cartoons has led me to believe).

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